I wore my halo crooked just to watch it fall,
Lit a cigarette with prayers I never meant at all,
You said I was a problem wearing perfect white,
Too sharp for your sweet silence, too loud for your polite.
I kissed the mirror hard enough to bruise the glass,
Asked my reflection why the good things never last,
There’s lipstick on the rim of every word you said,
A little bit of sugar, a little more unsaid.

Oh, isn’t it delicious?
How we bleed and call it love.
Isn’t it suspicious?
How we beg the stars above.

I’m not your wounded lover,
I won’t wash your hands clean.
I’m the noise beneath your thunder,
The girl inside the machine.
You can call me complicated,
You can call me what you need.
But I was never made to
Die politely while you leave.

You loved me like a secret, kept me under lock,
A little souvenir you hid inside your pocket watch,
I laughed like broken china scattered on the floor,
Pretty when it shatters, but nobody wants more.
I learned to wear my anger like a velvet dress,
Soft enough to touch, sharp enough to confess,
You held me like a question no one wants to hear,
Too honest for your comfort, too holy for your fear.

Oh, isn’t it addictive?
How we drown and call it fate.
Isn’t it poetic?
How we smile and marinate.

I’m not your wounded lover,
I won’t wash your hands clean.
I’m the noise beneath your thunder,
The girl inside the machine.
You can call me complicated,
You can call me what you need.
But I was never made to
Die politely while you leave.

And all the little girls with mouths like loaded guns,
Still learn to bite their tongues and call the damage fun,
But I’ve been resurrected by the wreckage in my chest,
And baby, what survives me
Never needed your permission to exist.

I’m not your redemption,
I’m not your sweet relief.
I’m every ugly truth
You tried to drown in something sweet.
You can call me difficult,
You can say I’m hard to hold.
But I was born a riot,
Not a story to be told.

So keep your careful mercy,
Your half-heart, your pretty lies.
I’ve got a mouth like midnight
And a storm behind my eyes.